-> "Lithium: Madness Smoothed, Hazy"
Original Song Title:
"Lydia, the Tattooed Lady"
Original Performer:
Groucho Marx (in 'At the Circus')
Parody Song Title:
"Lithium: Madness Smoothed, Hazy"
The Lyrics
My mind was like a three-ring circus,
I craved some lithium.
"The world is so unfair," I railed and thundered,
'Cause tall folks called me "shorty."
Ah, lithium.
Although it can't alter your features,
If you're undone
You will no longer feel low. . .
Pleasantly stunned.
Ooooooooh,
Lithium, where is my lithium?
Lithium: madness smoothed, hazy.
It can tranquilize a horse, so
Your head and torso remorse go.
Lithium, mo' lithium!
I crush pills; I'm sniffin' 'em.
Oh lithium, it cleans up the blues.
On my back, I'm unrattled by water through
The wreckage of my house, 'cause the gas line blew.
I got my meds, I'm alright, I'm not blue.
You won't squirm a lot on lithium.
Li li li, thi thi thi, um um um
Now my hair is uncurled,
I have a tranquil world,
I schlep through life without a care.
Time goes slowly, and I'm no longer embarrassed.
Of my unwashed smell, I am unaware.
Li li li, thi thi thi, um um um
Lithium, where is my lithium?
Lithium: madness smoothed, hazy.
I'm seriously relaxin',
Not ill at ease from a klaxon.
Lithium, mo' lithium!
No recycled Librium!
Oh lithium, it cleans up head squalls.
Now two shits I don't give--
Not berserk when I'm razzed.
If it's mixed with Viagra, just your body's jazzed--
Up for three days--just shrug and say that you're "spazzed."
You won't lurch a lot with lithium.
Li li li, thi thi thi, um um um
It don't bother me each time I hear a shrill basso,
I eat Italian food that is molto grasso.
Don't care if pate's balding; plate's got Baked Alaska on;
Eat Godiva chocolates in caloric marathon.
Li li li, thi thi thi, um um um
Put me in jail 'an I'm failing to act a con. . .
Won't get bent out of shape;
Just lie there and crack a yawn.
When prison guards awake me from slumber
I don't care if in chains I'm encumbered.
Li li li, thi thi thi, um um um
Lithium, ode lithium!
To it I'll sing dithyrambs.
Lithium, you'll laugh at catcalls.
I once met an admiral out in the street.
He signed me up and put me into the fleet
I'm off to Iraq, so tranq'd I just say, "Sweet!"
You're never harried on lithium.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.0 | |
How Funny: | 3.4 | |
Overall Rating: | 3.4 | |
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Total Votes: | 5 |
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Voting Breakdown
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