The Blue Danube flows,
It flows, it flows..
Real draggy it goes,
It goes, it goes..
Like some turtle's toes,
It's toes, it's toes..
Or traffic that slows,
That slows, that slows..
In circles and rows
Glide Jills and Joes
Up high, hold their nose,
Their nose, their nose..
They all look absurd,
Like a rube.....
When they waltz
The Blue Danube

The Blue Danube plays,
It plays, it plays..
The Blue Danube strays,
It strays, it strays..
It swoops and it sways,
It sways, it sways..
Monotonous, stays,
And stays, and stays..
It goes on for days,
For days, (four days?)
The listener pays,
Head lays, eyes glaze,
From sleep, they are stirred,
Tuba's "Toob!"
Blaring from
The Blue Danube

It's a dinosaur
Just like Dinah Shore
Keep it locked up,
No more stocked up..
Scrap that Model "T"
Old time melody..
Have it's burial
'Neath the sea and the salts..

Sorry, Mister Strauss,
Sounds like Mickey Mouse
Music backgrounds,
Hares chased by hounds..
What the world plays now
Is low, not highbrow
Maestro, put away
That old Blue Danube Waltz..

The Blue Danube sucks,
It sucks, it sucks
Like slow uphill trucks,
Slow trucks, slow trucks..
Guys dance in a tux,
A tux, a tux
They all look like schmucks
Like schmucks, like schmucks..
Progress, it obstructs,
Obstructs, obstructs..
And brings in no bucks,
No bucks, no bucks..
They'd prob'lly still play
Rubik's Cube..
Those who'd waltz
The Blue Danube..

They'd prob'lly still play
Rubik's Cube..
Those who'd do
The Blue Danube..