I worked at an office, in a cubicle there
Was standin' by the water cooler, had to stare
Because I saw a fellow worker's male mistake
So, as subtle as I could I whispered hey there, Jake..

Straighten up your fly right
Straighten up your fly right
Straighten up your fly right
Check down, Buddy, better hitch your zip
Girls might giggle silly
Get a peek at Willy
Straighten up your fly right
Check down, Buddy, better hitch your zip

He glanced at his trousers, and his face turned red
Grabbed his crotch, and here's what he said,
"My zipper track is broken, it won't stay high
I'll need some safety pins to fix, repair, and apply"

Straighten up your fly right
Straighten up your fly right
Straighten up your fly right
Check down, Buddy, better hitch your zip
Girls might giggle silly
Get a peek at Willy
Straighten up your fly right
Check down, Buddy, better hitch your zip

So, we walked in the men's room, I had pins to fix
Down on my knees, I'm mendin' when a sharp one pricks
The men's room door swings open just as my friend yelps
Now we are both job huntin'..it was our boss, Phelps..

Straightened up his fly right
Straightened up his fly right
Straightened up his fly right
Fixed it so that he could hitch his zip
Boss thought a sex session
Got the wrong impression
Straightened up his fly right
Trouble is both of our jobs went zip