While I was workin' on a speech
Enlight'nin' AMA,
I saw an eight-gig "goody box"
A-floatin' on e-Bay.
I clicked on it and opened it up
And much to my surprise,
Oh, I discovered ObamaCare;
The sight made sore my eyes.
Oh my, this government's planned health care,
So bright, immortal, wise!

I copied it and drove to town
With happy smiling face.
I took it to a lawyer friend
Who'd try most any case.
But this is what that scholar decreed
As he talked off-the-top:
"Oh, I've doubts, and fear that ObamaCare
Will soon be called a flop!"
"Oh, about a year, and ObamaCare
Will surely stall or stop!"

I turned around; a shot rang out.
He's gunnin' for my life!
And then I booked into ER
To go beneath the knife.
But this is what they hollered at me
As I lay on the floor:
"Oh, get out of here with ObamaCare
And don't come back no more!"
"Oh, stay out of here till ObamaCare
Can pay us back some more!"

[Instrumental Interlude]

I stumbled all around the town,
Until I chanced to meet
A doctor who was lookin' for
A way to make ends meet.
He said he'd taken ev'ry new plan;
He was in desp'rate straits.
But when I showed him ObamaCare,
He turned and raised his rates!
Oh, when he knows of ObamaCare;
He'll spurn it, leave the States!

My wounds hung on for many years.
Then, victim of my fate,
One fearful day I came upon
Saint Peter at the gate;
And when I tried to make it inside,
He told me where to go:
"Set out in fear, without hope for change,
Forsaken down below!"
"Oh, get out of here with ObamaCare;
They'll take it, down below!"

The moral of this story is
What I'm about to teach.
If Congress sees a great big bill
By demagogues who preach,
Don't vote until they've opened it up.
That's my advice so true,
'Cause we can't put a lid on ObamaCare
Till Democrats are few!
Oh, we'll never get rid of ObamaCare
Until we swat the Blue!