[Me:] Weeelllll,

Carol Selling is a mean old jerk, she's a mean old jerk.
She's the meanest jerk in the whole wide world,
She's an evil jerk, if there ever was a jerk.
She's a jerk to all the boys and girls.

Every day she smells really bad.
Every day she looks so ugly that it drives people insane.
On Wednesday thru Saturday she's a very foulmothed jerk.
Then on Sunday just to be different,
Shes u super king kamehameha jerkface!

Have you ever met my arch enemy Carol
She's the biggest jerk in the whole wide world,
She's a mean old jerk, she has stupid hair and really bad breath,
She's a jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk
jerk, jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk
She's a nasty jerk, Carol Selling's a jerk.
And she's such a cold hearted jerkface.

Talk to kids around the world,
It might go a little something like this...

[Sung in three different languages by other children]

Have you ever met my arch enemy Carol
She's the biggest jerk in the whole wide world,
She's a mean old jerk, she has stupid hair and really bad breath,
She's a jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk, jerk
jerk, jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk jerk.
She's an evil jerk, Carol Selling's an evil jerk
And she's such a cold heated jerkface.

I really mean it,
Carol Selling, she's a cruel, evil stinking jerk.
Big old evil jerk, Carol Seeeelllling.....
Yeahhhhh, Chaaaaa