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Song Parodies -> "Grifting Hell"

Original Song Title:

"Jingle Bells"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Grifting Hell"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Grafting dudes will show
to stooges they’re gonna play
info that is faux,
made up all the way.

“Swell!” is what the marks think,
but they lack insight.
Much later their spirits will sink
when that brain bulb burns bright. Woe!

Grifter smell, grifting hell,
grifting is the play.
When you find, your dough’s been pried,
perps will have drifted away.

Grifter smell, grifting hell,
grifting is the play.
When you find, your dough’s been pried,
grifters have drifted away.

They take away your dough,
taking you for a ride.
You find, it wasn’t bright
their BS to abide.
You now go to your bank
and find out that you’ve got
not a penny; your account’s shanked;
so you can’t buy more pot, toke.

Grifter smell, grifting hell,
grifting is the play.
When you find, your dough’s been pried
from you thieves are gone away.

Grifter smell, grifting hell,
grifting was play.
When you find, your dough’s been pried,
filchers have drifted away.

They take all but your clothes—
you didn’t catch the tell,
right in front of your nose,
that these guys don’t mean well.
Your gelt’s been kissed “goodbye”;
for being scammed you must pay.
You decide to have a good cry,
but things still ain’t OK. Woe!

Sniveling hell, sniveling hell,
dribbling-nose outlay.
When you find, your dough’s been pried…
sniveling, dribbling pout day.

Grifter smell, grifting hell,
grifters lifted pay.
When you find, your dough’s been pried,
grifters have drifted away.

You feel down alright,
down and deeply sunk.
In your cashless plight,
you can’t go and get drunk.
A waste of time to pray
in this time of great need.
You have been the crimesters’ prey—
you’re so broke, you can’t feed.

Dinner’s quelled, dinner’s squelched—
nixed is the buffet.
No more lunch or dinner time.
Even one course—there’s no way.

Dinner bell will not knell.
Thinner than a blade
of knife you’ll be; your insides
have no gorged grub—you’ve been played.

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Pacing: 5.0
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Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 16

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