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Song Parodies -> "Shopping Cart of Pork and Beans"
Original Song Title:
"Boulevard of Broken Dreams"
Original Performer:
Green Day
Parody Song Title:
"Shopping Cart of Pork and Beans"
Parody Written by:
Spaff.com
The Lyrics
I'm stuck in smelly clothes
Because the town shut off my H20
My apartment blows
There's no way to flush and things start to grow
I walk through Jubilee's
Load the shopping cart with pork and beans
I'm a pungent breeze
But I can't take a bath so I bought cologne
I bought cologne
I bought cologne
I bought cologne
(And vodka)
My doggy's
Only one who sleeps beside me
My soggy
Socks can really take a beating
Sometimes I
Hope to purge what died inside me
Till then I - wear cologne
Uh-ah - Blah-ah - Fwuh-ah - Maaa-ma!
Gbla-ah - Pwuh-ah - Ugh-gah!
My date shows up at nine
Way more hot than some I've met online
Me, I'm dressed up fine
No clean underwear - but hot cologne
She says Holy Swine
Turns and runs off screaming, deathly white
Like I'm Frankenstein
But I don't understand 'cause I've got cologne
I've got cologne
I've got cologne
I've got cologne
(And vodka)
My shadow's
Only one who'll walk behind me
My rat hole
Room has methane gas for breathing
Sometimes I
Wish these fleas refused to bite me
Till then I - wear cologne
Uh-ah - Pwuh-ah - Ugh-gah - Maaa-ma!
Fwuh-ah - Blah-ah!
I've got cologne
(And vodka)
[Solo. As in alone.]
I walk through Winn-Dix-ee's
Load the shopping cart with pork and beans
Smell like Munster cheese
But I can't take a bath so I bought co-
My schnauzer's
Only one who sleeps beside me
My trousers
Harbor some disease that's breeding
Sometimes I
Watch the neighbors picket-line me
Oh well I've - got cologne
[Solo. Again.]
Because the town shut off my H20
My apartment blows
There's no way to flush and things start to grow
I walk through Jubilee's
Load the shopping cart with pork and beans
I'm a pungent breeze
But I can't take a bath so I bought cologne
I bought cologne
I bought cologne
I bought cologne
(And vodka)
My doggy's
Only one who sleeps beside me
My soggy
Socks can really take a beating
Sometimes I
Hope to purge what died inside me
Till then I - wear cologne
Uh-ah - Blah-ah - Fwuh-ah - Maaa-ma!
Gbla-ah - Pwuh-ah - Ugh-gah!
My date shows up at nine
Way more hot than some I've met online
Me, I'm dressed up fine
No clean underwear - but hot cologne
She says Holy Swine
Turns and runs off screaming, deathly white
Like I'm Frankenstein
But I don't understand 'cause I've got cologne
I've got cologne
I've got cologne
I've got cologne
(And vodka)
My shadow's
Only one who'll walk behind me
My rat hole
Room has methane gas for breathing
Sometimes I
Wish these fleas refused to bite me
Till then I - wear cologne
Uh-ah - Pwuh-ah - Ugh-gah - Maaa-ma!
Fwuh-ah - Blah-ah!
I've got cologne
(And vodka)
[Solo. As in alone.]
I walk through Winn-Dix-ee's
Load the shopping cart with pork and beans
Smell like Munster cheese
But I can't take a bath so I bought co-
My schnauzer's
Only one who sleeps beside me
My trousers
Harbor some disease that's breeding
Sometimes I
Watch the neighbors picket-line me
Oh well I've - got cologne
[Solo. Again.]
(c) 2005+ Cheeses of Suburbia
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 10 | 2 | 5 | ||||||||
| 5 | 28 | 35 | 33 |
User Comments
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For those who Don't Know The Original Song, it's currently available at spaff.com/dktos
I'm so happy you wrote this...I heard the song on the radio the other day, thought of an idea, but forgot the name of the original song. So you helped me out. Don't know if I can match this though =)
Holy Swine. Great stuff, love the schnauzer/ trouser rhyme.
A wonderful character study, Spaffers. 555
A true story: In the middle of the 80s my sister was an exchange program student somewhere in Oregon for a year. She told me that one of the things that surprised her the most was that so many of the girls her age didnĀ't take a shower after athletic/gym class, they just changed back to their regular clothes and sprayed themselves with perfume, lots of perfume.
LOL! 555! THis is awesome
Yet another first-rate parody from Spaff. And I am a Green Day fan, so bonus points on the choice of TOS.
Thanx, C4P & Aggro & Jackie & Olvan!
Jeffaroo: I went through an embarrassingly long list of title and "I walk alone" subs before settling on this one. So I'm doubly curious to see yours.
Peterchyd: Hey, don't destroy my 80s schoolboy fantasy of my classmates taking long, luxurious group showers.
Jeffaroo: I went through an embarrassingly long list of title and "I walk alone" subs before settling on this one. So I'm doubly curious to see yours.
Peterchyd: Hey, don't destroy my 80s schoolboy fantasy of my classmates taking long, luxurious group showers.
the actions of a typi-colognely guy - or destined to be one at least - DKTOS Spaff but a funny read - bummer of a job for your shadow - 555
Thanx, Stuartiste. "Typicolognely guy" - heh heh.
Next time someone asks me why I built that shrine to you out of sticky things I found in your trash, I'm just going to point them to this parody. Phew! Hi Karate, eh? Ugh! (holding nose) Lub id, Spav -- fuddy, fuddy stub!
Mel: Thanx, but if you knew what those sticky things were, you'd, um... never mind. Just see a doctor.
My friend loves the book Because of Win-dixie when I show'd her this she was like freaking out.
You get your wish, it's up today =)
Very good, Spaff. I just finished mine, called "I Wok Alone" so I'm making the rounds. I missed a lot of quality work too. Fave lines: "My shadow's [o]nly one who'll walk behind me" and "Smell like Munster Cheese"
Well done, Spaff. A lot of good lines, and I, too, favored the shadow line.
Thanx, Spanked Elf & Jeffaroo (nice) & 2nz (I'll check it out) & Johnkins (that was ripped off from the OS).
Ooh i like this! fits in very well!
Thanx. Fluffy whales are my favorite kind.
I heard a parody of this song on Dr. Demento last night called "Cologne", and it was by the Dan Orr Project. I have to say, I am quite suspicious of them... Of course, I suppose that "I walk alone" could easily be misheard as, "I wear cologne", which could be used as inspiration for a parody. Who knows?
Thanx for the heads-up, YWN. Back in January when I set out to parody this OS, I thought "I wear cologne" was the clear choice for the "I walk alone" sub, so it doesn't surprise me that someone else has come up with the same idea. Still, I intend to sue their asses off.
I read your parady and that is hilarious! 555! The pacing was really good too!
Thanx, Dayna. Pacing - yeah, I do a lot of that.
Just happened to have this song playing so thought I'd check out your parody at the same time. You've a dirty mind, Spafford!
Two words, Luke: (1) Pot. (2) Kettle.
Id lvoe to see this recorded
Man, this was a good one. "I load the shopping cart with pork and beans, I'm a pungent breeze..." that was my favorite. 5s across the board.
Belated thanx, Mixmaster! And Jackie: Sorry, but I'm afraid you're going to have to settle for either "I'm Karl Malone" or "I Blog Alone." Or both.
Mmmmm... cologne and vodka. Two great tastes that go great together. Excellent as always, and I hope you get the shower fixed.
Thanx, Rex. They're also good for removing stains. Or creating them. (I forget which.)
2 questions Spaff...
How dids I miss this and why isn't it recorded?!
Awsome!!
Thanx, Spoof-Man. I can't answer the first question, but as for your second: Apparently Robert thought two recorded parodies of "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" was plenty. Did you ever hear "I Blog Alone"?
Yes I did and I love it!!
Thanks, S-M. It loves you too.
To set the record straight, Dan Orr, of the Dan Orr Project, worked on a radio station in Columbus, OH when he recorded "I Wear Cologne" and first broadcast it on his Station's Morning Show. This happened in Late 2004/early 2005, very shortly after the original "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" was released as a single. I didn't air on Dr. Demento for a while afterward, so I'd say the two parodies are coincidence.
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