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Song Parodies -> "Tight-Fitting Bodice"
Original Song Title:
"Time in a Bottle"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Jim Croce
Parody Song Title:
"Tight-Fitting Bodice"
Parody Written by:
John A. Barry
The Lyrics
They write of tight-fitting bodices
That rip before you reach page two.
You could say every page--
Eternally exactly the same.
Foreplay--they never screw?
These pages--anything but clever,
The prose, always purple, not blue.
Always the same game--perpetually lame.
Why spend money on this lit poo?
This formulaic fluff, a waste of time--
Of dubious authorship, too--
Often by men.
Looked at these books enough to know
That no one took the time to go
Through, edit.
These books only fit to wrap fishes,
Still, huge reams of paper ensue.
The schlock prose empty
Lame attempt at poetry
How can readers stand?
Asks haiku.
That rip before you reach page two.
You could say every page--
Eternally exactly the same.
Foreplay--they never screw?
These pages--anything but clever,
The prose, always purple, not blue.
Always the same game--perpetually lame.
Why spend money on this lit poo?
This formulaic fluff, a waste of time--
Of dubious authorship, too--
Often by men.
Looked at these books enough to know
That no one took the time to go
Through, edit.
These books only fit to wrap fishes,
Still, huge reams of paper ensue.
The schlock prose empty
Lame attempt at poetry
How can readers stand?
Asks haiku.
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Voting Breakdown
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| 1 | 0 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
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| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 7 | 7 | 7 |
User Comments
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Amen. Lit poo is a good name for it. So is turdworthy. I am learning a whole new vocabulary on this website.
This is pretty funny, tho the Damsels of Orion series is actually pretty good.
Man, maybe I should make some bucks writing that fluff.
If you only knew how much money churches made by peddling old romance paperbacks in their rummage sales. This is known as a madness to their Methodism. Maybe somebody should call Joey the Rat -- I mean, His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI -- and tell him. Maybe he can put a plague on both houses, that of worship and that of publishing.
Amen..555
Nice. 5's.
Sophistically hilarious, John...A novel idea..
hardy-har-harlequin...i was girdled with laughter...5s
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