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Song Parodies -> "Halve Yourself ’f Not Wary in a Rip Fest"
Original Song Title:
"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"
Original Performer:
Bing Crosby
Parody Song Title:
"Halve Yourself ’f Not Wary in a Rip Fest"
Parody Written by:
John A. Barry
The Lyrics
Halve yourself ’f not wary in a rip fest:
Maple, Beech boards. . .pine.
An arm’s gone
Out bubbles fluid, the red kind.
Halve yourself ’f not chary when you’re ripping,
Or a you-cide day—
A leg’s gone,
Out bubbles a large vat of “A.”
There you are. . .gonna croak today,
Having no longer limbs, four.
I say, friend, ere you shear and cut,
Have some fear of saw-caused gore.
Get your rear in gear before you sever
Boards made from a bough—
Have that whining saw not nigh you now.
Don’t halve yourself; be wary—no rip-chest allow.
Maple, Beech boards. . .pine.
An arm’s gone
Out bubbles fluid, the red kind.
Halve yourself ’f not chary when you’re ripping,
Or a you-cide day—
A leg’s gone,
Out bubbles a large vat of “A.”
There you are. . .gonna croak today,
Having no longer limbs, four.
I say, friend, ere you shear and cut,
Have some fear of saw-caused gore.
Get your rear in gear before you sever
Boards made from a bough—
Have that whining saw not nigh you now.
Don’t halve yourself; be wary—no rip-chest allow.
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User Comments
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Please Sir, Captain BedBug, alias Pirate Jack de BareAll, . . go easy on that '~You'll Log ~ . . . . .
JAB - Do you see what I saw? ;D
It seems that JB and powertools are a lethal combination! Very clever word choices, especially your references to blood.
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